About Shoshana Garfield

 

My name is Shoshana and I can honestly say that nothing bad has ever happened to me.  Ever. 

 

I say that now – even though I sure didn’t always think this way.  I grew up with a drug addicted mother (including a stint on crack and who supplemented her benefits income with drug dealing), and a violent father (he and I get along really well now, by the by).  I grew up lonely with cockroaches crawling on my silverware and in my breakfast cereal in New York City.  When I was 4 years old, my mother took me to drug parties, where I was taken to a back room and tortured and abused.  By the time I was 5, I had a serious mental health condition that went undiagnosed for decades – Dissociative Identity Disorder (DID), formerly known as Multiple Personality.  By the time I was 6, I was suicidal, and made an earnest attempt to end my life.  It didn’t work, or rather, it did work out, because I survived the attempt and am here to share my journey out of darkness.  It wasn’t only childhood stuff, either – I’ve got 3 failed marriages, two of which were abusive, more rapes as a teen and adult than I can count, and one of the most massive challenges of my adult life – the death of my son in infancy.

 

And nothing bad has ever happened to me, ever.

 

I was in psychotherapy for over 20 years – and it wasn’t enough.  I spent thousands on various alternative methods such as Reiki and some weird treatments I can’t even remember the names of – it wasn’t enough.  It was when I discovered the energy-based methods such as EFT and Psychoanalytic Energy Psychology (PEP link) developed by the visionary Dr Phil Mollon that the turbo-charged stage of my personal healing truly began. 

 

These methods were so effective in bringing me the deep release I had been craving all these years, so of course I had to train in them.  I spent the next few years, while I was completing my doctorate in psychology, going to loads of trainings, and learning with the awesome Dr Phil Mollon, and the EFT wonders of Gwyneth Moss and Karl Dawson.  Of course, I learned with every client as well, in every session, and continue to do so.

 

Although there are many aspects of my work that have adapted to severe trauma work, I came to realise that there were three aspects in particular that the standard EFT protocols just missed entirely:

·  Hidden ‘reversals’

· Spiritual show-stoppers

·  Who the real client is

 

Hidden ‘Reversals’

 

We have an energy system, and we hold all kinds of misconceptions in it that can stop healing.  Things like feeling, either consciously or very unconsciously, like I didn’t deserve to heal, for example, because I was still carrying shame over what happened – in other words, I was still blaming myself.  That had to go!  There are many such blockages, such as being so identified with the trauma that giving it up is like a kind of annihilation, etc.  Using PEP, I now teach the most common blocks and how to take them down.

 

Spiritual Show-Stoppers

 

There are two main strand of this – forgiveness, and what I humorously think of as killing God.  I have come to see how forgiveness is a vital component of all healing, and have now identified 9 myths that stop forgiveness and ways to deal with each of them. 

 

And, for killing God – everyone I’ve come across with severe trauma, myself included, has at some point asked themselves some version of: “Why me?”  and “How could this happen?”  and “What kind of God allows such sick stuff?”  These are philosophical questions that touch the core of spiritual questing.  We need to kill off the false Gods that deal out punishment and cruelty, and create (or, if you wish, recognise) a Divinity/higher power/is-ness that is Pure Love only.  Punishment and cruelty become nonsensical.  Belief in a monotheistic deity is unnecessary for healing and forgiving; a spiritual understanding of connection and love is much more crucial.  

 

Who The Real Client Is

 

I have found, personally and clinically, that although you have memories of what happened, it actually – wait for it – didn’t happen to you!  It happened to the you at the age when It happened!  So, we have to go back and heal the energy field of the relevant you – the present-day you also reaps the same benefits.   Unless you go back and work with the age of you when it happened, there will be trauma left, like rot left in the jaw after a tooth extraction.  The trauma relief work isn’t done until all of it is cleaned out.

 

I combine a new EFT and Journey-Work (Brandon Bays) based method called DeepClean with PEP to get spectacular results for myself and my clients.  And because I know how to deal with the Big Stuff, I can cope with just about any trauma, no matter how seemingly big or no matter how seemingly small.  And I can help you too, whether you are looking for ways to improve your clinical skills or if you need some individual attention.  I can also help you upgrade the skill sets of your staff in handling their clients, and I have taught London Fire Brigade staff, NHS staff, and assisted Dr Mollon in teaching psychotherapists and psychologists.

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